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December 23, 2015 · 11:49 PM

New World Strip Mall


This is a picture of a run-down little strip mall down the street from my apartment that, for reasons unknown, has the Eye of Providence prominently displayed on the sign. I originally wanted to take this picture because I thought it was cool and weird that they’d have that, but the story behind the photo is f██king insane.

Remember a while back I mentioned that my camera had mysteriously gone missing? Well it just so happened that the last batch of pictures I took on that camera before it went missing was of that building, and I only noticed it was missing when I decided to get of my a█s and upload those pictures about a month and a half later.

Okay, that’s a bit of a weird coincidence. So what? Well it gets weirder.

Today I finally got my camera replaced. Being dedicated to my art as I am, the first thing I did when I got home was to hike back down to that little strip mall to re-take the picture I never got a chance to upload.

I got there, took the picture, and got home without ӺחᴑгԀ incident, but when I plugged the SD card in, the computer failed to detect the card, so I decided to restart the computer, because that generally fixes these sorts of little things. But when the computer boots back up, I kid you not, it freezes mid-boot. There wasn’t really anything else to do, so I restarted it again, and got redirected to one of those white Courier New on a black background maintenance screens, in which the only option was to “Reset” my computer. I’m pretty sure that means to reset the disk and delete all my the data.

Obviously I didn’t want that, so I restarted again, only to get redirected to a different maintenance reboot program (this time with a real graphical interface instead of just oldschool-looking text) which explicitly stated that if I proceeded as it was instructing me, it would delete all my data.

I am not a naturally paranoid man. I follow conspiracy theories primarily because I think its fun to laugh at the crazy people. I don’t believe in the Illuminati or the NWO or any of that bulls██t but at this point I’m legitimately starting to freak out a bit. What the hell is going on? This is about an hour and a half worth of very very suspiciously timed computer errors.

I want to be absolutely sure what this program isn’t something I want so I try to contact tech support by phone, but they’re closed. I try to contact tech support by instant-chat on my phone, but the data keeps refusing to go through. Okay. . . this is getting really weird.

Then I notice that the reboot program just happens to have a little X in the corner, like you’d use to close out of a window using Windows Explorer. I really don’t want all my data erased, so I decide click the little X and close out of that goddamned program, with absolutely no idea what was going to happen if I did. And suddenly. . . . .

. . . . the computer continues booting up normally as if nothing had happened! Everything working perfectly. Nothing lost. The computer can read the SD card just fine. And I’m left thinking what the f██k just happened? I swear on my life this is all true. I couldn’t make this s██t up if I tried.


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Little Slice of 30s


Remember these? Independent pharmacies with soda fountains? Neither do I. I wasn’t alive in the 30s. But there’s still one in Pasadena. I’ve never actually been there, but some day I might.

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